I Don’t Want To Talk Today

I know that headline sounds ridiculous, but it’s the truth, and I’m not referring to my desire, or lack of desire, to speak Spanish, but rather just in general, I don’t feel like talking.  Anyone who has known me for more than say, five minutes knows I am not the most outgoing of people, and even when I find myself in a comfortable setting, I prefer to let others do the talking until I find something useful to say.  When I am at work, I have no choice but to talk, whether it be to my crew or to the customers.  There’s no way around it, I have to speak.  As anyone who follows this knows, I am in the process of learning Spanish, which obviously requires some talking in order to improve.  I have had some difficulties with this lately and have been trying to refocus my energies on forcing myself to speak in Spanish as often as I can.  Sometimes I will find myself talking to myself in my apartment, but today, I don’t even feel like doing that.  You see, some days, and this happens a lot when I am home, I just would rather be silent.  I worked over ten hours today and certainly I spoke my share of words, and now I am home and looking forward to a little relaxation.  Some people need TV or video games or some kind of noise to keep them going, but I find I can be perfectly content in absolute silence.  No music, no TV, nothing.

I worry sometimes that my enjoyment of solitude is going to haunt me some day, but right now, sitting in my bedroom with the door closed and no other sound to bother me but the hum of my air conditioner is very relaxing.  Sure, sometimes it gets lonely with no one to talk to, but right now, I am perfectly content with my silence.  At some point before going to bed this evening I will want to post a blog entry in my Spanish blog, and usually I read it out loud to myself to get in a little speaking practice, but I am not sure if today I will have the energy.  I’ll probably poke around online a bit more this afternoon and I have some things to read, but I think anything involving sound is out for the rest of the day.  I am going to bask in the silence.  Wish me luck and I’ll talk….or not talk, to you soon.


~ by James on July 14, 2013.

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