The Good, The Bad, and The Really Freaking Ugly

So my new laptop arrived yesterday.  I managed to spend basically my entire day setting up this new toy to look exactly like the old one.  Yes, we buy fancy new computers just to load all our old crap onto them.  In any case, initially I was happy to tinker around with the settings and discover some of the new features of Windows 8, the new operating system.  Now, I am no computer nerd and I don’t know how to do much aside from changing the desktop background, but I can usually manage to figure things out as I go along.  It turns out, Windows 8 is not terribly hard to use.  In fact, aside from a few little annoying changes, the basic functionality is no different than any other Windows based computer I have ever used.  That being said, Windows 8 is freaking ugly.  I realize there are more important qualities to look for besides how it looks, but for a guy like me who is extremely drawn to attractive things, this OS is an eyesore to me.  It is full of pastel colors and this mess of blocks they call apps, meant to make accessing your things easier.  It is ugly to look at and I spent a good portion of my afternoon looking for ways to eliminate as many of these apps as I could.  I don’t think the point of the new system is to go through and delete all the new things, but that is how I plan on spending my next day off.

I went on in my last post about how I let little insignificant things bother me and my new resolution is to do my best not to let trivial matters worry me.  I always find something to stress out over and I have come to see in hindsight that the amount of effort I put into being stressed is in no way equal to the amount of trouble it truly caused me.  That is to say, I often stress out over money, yet I still have food on my table, clothes on my back, and a car to get me to work.  I worry about friends, love, change, life, and all these other things that I don’t need to lose sleep over.  I have great friends and a family I love very much.  The other things are nice to think about, but impossible to change overnight.  Sure, I could do some things to change my situation, but really my situation isn’t nearly as bad as I like to make it seem.  My point to all this is to say that normally, after a day like today, in the past I would be prone to complain about how things went, but aside from a poor color scheme, really things aren’t that bad.  It was a pretty drab day.  It either was raining or just cloudy and cold all afternoon and the only time I left my place was this morning to get breakfast and then once to go to the gym.  I didn’t really have much else to do, and the weather just made me want to stay in.

OK, yes, I did chat with Destini, and yes, that made me happy for a short time, but I have decided not to actively pursue her in any way beyond friendship, at least for now.  She must know I am attracted to her and if she doesn’t, I am not going to come out and tell her.  She loves her boyfriend, even if on occasion things are shaky between them.  If she were to break up with him then maybe I would make a move, but I am not going to be the asshole who breaks them up.  She is involved with his whole family, not just him, and I can only imagine the death threats I would receive from his family if I came between the two of them.  For now, I will just go on as always and look for other ways to smile everyday.

In any case, it’s getting late, so I’ll leave it at that for now.  I am sure we will talk again soon.


~ by James on December 6, 2013.

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